The Great Bacon War
by luvsanime02
Summary: Sometimes, wars begin over very important problems. And then there's this war.


**Disclaimer: **I don't own Gundam Wing, and am making no money off of this fic.

**AN: **Written for the June 7th Cocktail Party prompt found here: gwcocktailfriday . tumblr .com(/)post/185292792764/cocktail-friday-post-responses-on-friday-june. (Without the spaces and parentheses.)

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**The Great Bacon War** by luvsanime02

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Hilde stared wordlessly at the drink in front of her. Not that Duo could blame her.

"Is that bacon?" he asked, leaning forward to check more closely. It looked like bacon, but no bacon should be skewered on a stick with an orange slice, and then dropped inside a glass of…

"What the hell did you order?" Trowa asked, just as Duo was about to. He didn't know what it was supposed to be, either. A tentative sniff didn't help any, and Hilde looked like she was still too stunned to answer the question anytime soon.

"Maybe it's a piece of apple?" Quatre said, his tone doubtful. In contrast to Duo, Quatre leaned back, as though to get as far away from Hilde's drink as possible.

Wufei raised an eyebrow. "That's not any better than bacon," he pointed out.

"Yes, it is," Trowa disagreed. "An orange and an apple? Would make sense if it was something fruity."

"Bacon and an apple would have been better," Wufei argued.

"I ordered a Manhattan," Hilde finally said. Whether she spoke because she was answering Trowa's question at last, or because she wanted to end the argument, was anyone's guess.

The table fell into contemplative silence.

"Are you actually going to drink that?" Duo eventually asked, morbidly curious. "With the bacon, and all?"

Hilde shrugged. "I'm not sure," she admitted. "They brought it all together, so maybe it tastes good?"

Her tone was not optimistic. Duo just could not see how bacon could be good in a Manhattan. "Dibs on the bacon," he said, "if you're not going to eat it."

Before she could reply, Trowa picked up the stick, pulled off the piece of bacon, and then popped it into his mouth, chewing loudly.

"Hey!" Duo said, not at all surprised but still annoyed. "I called dibs!"

"It's _my _drink," Hilde said. "I didn't say I wasn't going to eat that."

Trowa visibly swallowed, and then calmly returned to his own drink. Wufei laughed at Duo and Hilde's disgruntled expressions, and that seemed to break the tension.

"You weren't going to eat it anyway," Quatre said to Hilde, and she reluctantly nodded.

"I wasn't," she agreed, before sighing. She pulled the orange off of her glass and squeezed the juice into her drink, and then took a tentative sip. "It's pretty good," she said, sounding very relieved.

Duo pretended to be upset for another five seconds, before shaking his head and slouching down in his seat. "Why is bacon being put on everything now, anyway?" he asked no one in particular.

"Because it's bacon," Trowa replied, which wasn't really an answer at all, but everyone nodded their heads in agreement anyway.

Heero chose that moment to arrive. "What did I miss?" he asked, sitting down beside Duo and grabbing his drink before taking a sip.

"Does ownership mean nothing anymore?" Duo asked.

"Tell that to my clothes," Heero replied. "Half of them are at your apartment because you constantly steal them."

"I took his bacon," Trowa explained. "He's still upset about it."

"Is that a euphemism?" Heero asked dryly. Quatre snickered.

"It was _my _bacon," Hilde asserted again. "_Mine_."

"You could always order another one," Wufei said. Probably because he wanted to see Duo and Trowa fight over a second piece of bacon.

"I think I'll pass," Hilde said. "I'm not paying ten bucks for a tiny piece of bacon."

"Sounds reasonable," Heero said, and then when the waiter asked for his drink, ordered a Manhattan for himself.

"Challenge accepted," Trowa said, saluting Duo with his drink.

"You're on," Duo shot back, grinning.

"You do realize that means you both have to successfully steal the bacon from Heero?" Quatre asked them. Heero promptly got two challenging glances sent his way. He didn't look at all concerned.

And so the Great Bacon War began.


End file.
